Dr. Sam Lam Plastic Surgery Forum

that's okay. i like the mystery. like your moniker.

reading this was truly inspiring.

i am still undecided about what i want to do in life, at 26 years old and having gone through med school i do feel like i need to 'live up' to my identity. i do know that i want to do great things in the world, in fact, change things on a big scale. But it's tough... wish I had the same kind of singular focused vision that Dr lam has!

I think someone said to me once, that you don't pick your career/field but it picks you. Very 'woo woo' and whiel to some extent I do believe in inevitability, I also believe that we have the choice to make decisions which shape our destiny. It's amazing how things do align up and you can connect the dots backwards. At the moment my dots just seem splattered all over the map, ha.

when your dots align, please share that with all of us!

will do. if and when it happens!

it shall. will it so.

Hi Vince! Nice to meet you.

I believe that realizing where to focus on in and with our life in order to be happy and "to make a positive change" in the world is a 50%/50% result of our investigating / thinking of what could or should be our focus and passion combined with a more relaxed, spontaneous attitude of not thinking of the issue too much in a rational way and basically remain aware and open of our reactions at the "things" that happen in our life, and how we feel about them.
I know that sounds too general, sorry.
I mean that I have personally discovered more about myself and about where I want my life to be headed by just paying more attention to what days I felt particularly happy and why. I started taking mental notes of when and how I would spontaneously feel that a given day was fulfilling, and then, see what activities and skills of mine had been put into "use" during that day.
As I perservered on observing what thrilled me in different moments of the year, in different areas of my life, etc. I could slowly see what type of "personal call" and personal abilities *were there* -in sometimes seemingly very different activities- to connect the "dots" (by dots I mean the different "things" that made me happy, that listed alone seemed not be necessarily related one to the other).

I also realized that the more I watch at my spontaneous reactions now, the more authentic I try to be, the more I see myself longing for the same things or getting utterly thrilled about the very same type of thing (or somewhat related "things") that made me happy as a child. The more I try to become a balanced person, the more I realize the importance of not focusing only on being mature or rational, but also on being closer to the kid I was. I personally believe that looking in hindsight and with an open mind to our own childhood can give us big clues on what is our "call" in this world. Maybe because I think we are the most authentic and "unpolluted" version of ourselves (unpolluted by external pressures, by lies we tell ourselves, by prejudgments, etc.) when we are kids, and for that reason, closer, then, to our very essence. The very essence of who we are and of what makes us happy, of what talents we are born with or for what things we think and want to develop talents for.

In a few words, just watching my spontaneous reactions in the present, without being too rational about things, and at the same time connecting the dots between the positive moments in my life, plus the positive traits I had in my childhood have helped me understand myself better and stop being so "lost" and "scattered all over" in terms of finding my productive activity/work "niche".

Mind you, I am not even close to being where I want to be, but at least I have an idea of where I should head to, and it is good to know that and at the same type remain open minded to "change our path" or reshape it as we go through life and learn even more about ourselves.

I think one of our worst enemies when it comes to understanding ourselves and geting somewhere in life where we feel truly fulfilled is that life IS hectic and fast and so it is easy to fall into the inertiay of life's obligations and pressures.

One thing I am trying to do (I sometimes forget, but try not to) is to write down or take a mental note, each day, of :
a) something about myself
b) something new I learned about the world / life / culture, etc.
c) set a new goal, think of my goals and/or reshape them. Sometimes the new goal can be the simplest thing in the world, and apparently or really unrelated to my "main objective" in life, what matters is to keep learning something new at all times and devleoping new or different skills
d) if I had any bright idea, reflection or even crazy but interesting thought that could give me food for thought, write it down as to later look back and see if that "idea" could not have become useful, help me with my new objectives or even be analyzed differently in hindsight

Hope any, something of my rambling was helpful in some way.

Hugs!!!

[quote="Mysteryagain"]Hi Vince! Nice to meet you.

I believe that realizing where to focus on in and with our life in order to be happy and "to make a positive change" in the world is a 50%/50% result of our investigating / thinking of what could or should be our focus and passion combined with a more relaxed, spontaneous attitude of not thinking of the issue too much in a rational way and basically remain aware and open of our reactions at the "things" that happen in our life, and how we react and feel about them.

I know that sounds too general, sorry.
I mean that I have personally discovered more about myself and about where I want my life to be headed by just paying more attention to what days I felt particularly happy and why. I started taking mental notes of when and how I would spontaneously feel that a given day was fulfilling, and then, see what activities and skills of mine had been put into "use" during that day.
As I perservered on observing what thrilled me in different moments of the year, in different areas of my life, etc. I could slowly see what type of "personal call" and personal abilities *were there* -in sometimes seemingly very different activities- to connect the "dots" (by dots I mean the different "things" that made me happy, that listed alone seemed not be necessarily related one to the other).

I also realized that the more I watch at my spontaneous reactions now, the more authentic I try to be, the more I see myself longing for the same things or getting utterly thrilled about the very same type of thing (or somewhat related "things") that made me happy as a child. The more I try to become a balanced person, the more I realize the importance of not focusing only on being mature or rational, but also on being closer to the kid I was. I personally believe that looking in hindsight and with an open mind to our own childhood can give us big clues on what is our "call" in this world. Maybe because I think we are the most authentic and "unpolluted" version of ourselves (unpolluted by external pressures, by lies we tell ourselves, by prejudgments, etc.) when we are kids, and for that reason, closer, then, to our very essence. The very essence of who we are and of what makes us happy, of what talents we are born with or for what things we think and want to develop talents for.

In a few words, just watching my spontaneous reactions in the present, without being too rational about things, and at the same time connecting the dots between the positive moments in my life, plus the positive traits I had in my childhood have helped me understand myself better and stop being so "lost" and "scattered all over" in terms of finding my productive activity/work "niche".

Mind you, I am not even close to being where I want to be, but at least I have an idea of where I should head to, and it is good to know that and at the same type remain open minded to "change our path" or reshape it as we go through life and learn even more about ourselves.

I think one of our worst enemies when it comes to understanding ourselves and geting somewhere in life where we feel truly fulfilled is that life IS hectic and fast and so it is easy to fall into the inertiay of life's obligations and pressures.

One thing I am trying to do (I sometimes forget, but try not to) is to write down or take a mental note, each day, of :
a) something about myself
b) something new I learned about the world / life / culture, etc.
c) set a new goal, think of my goals and/or reshape them. Sometimes the new goal can be the simplest thing in the world, and apparently or really unrelated to my "main objective" in life, what matters is to keep learning something new at all times and devleoping new or different skills
d) if I had any bright idea, reflection or even crazy but interesting thought that could give me food for thought, write it down as to later look back and see if that "idea" could not have become useful, help me with my new objectives or even be analyzed differently in hindsight

Hope any, something of my rambling was helpful in some way.

Hugs!!![/quote]

i really like your thoughts. i would say this in conclusion:
1. the present: life is a journey so enjoy the ride. we are so often focused on our destination that we don't really take time to enjoy where we are currently.
2. the past: its gone. you can't change it but you can learn from it. i always say don't make a mistake twice.
3. the future: try to explore where your destination is otherwise you have no idea if your journey is in the right direction. find a destination and move toward it but always be willing to change paths if you need to. early changes are less painful than later changes.
hey this sounds like a good start for next week's blogs!!!
best,
sml

hey guys

just catching up, not a daily addict yet

nice meeting u mysteryagain. great stuff there. thanks for posting all that. interesting read. i think there's def a 'balance' to achieve between the 50/50 of being in the 'present' or in the zone with our work, and also looking forwards to great things. dr lam followed it up nicely with some of those conclusions. a friend of mine once said 'the past is nothing but a few molecules in your head, the future is all imaginary, so you only have the present.'

Carpe Diem I suppose.

great, i hope you like my blogs this week that explore this topic more in depth.